MAIM NEWSLETTERS
Monday 10th February 2025.
Dear readers,
LET NO MAN PUT ASUNDER.
Marriage is a very serious matter from the viewpoint of the Bible. When God created Adam and put him in charge in the garden of Eden, He noticed that it was not good for him to be alone. According to Genesis 2:18;
‘And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.’
In other words, after looking at His ultimate creation, God saw that it would be better for him have a partner and not live alone. Consequently, He created the help of Adam’s life for him. After that, He made his intention known concerning how their relationship could work by instructing them about the need to cleave or bond together.
‘Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.’ (Gen.2:24)
Our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ elaborated this thought line of God by saying in Matt.19:6 that once a man and woman has been joined together, they become one flesh. Once they come together, Jesus forbid anyone or anything to separate them. Today however, the divorce and separation rates are rising dramatically all over the world because we obviously ignorantly allow other people and circumstances around us to separate our marital relationships.
Looking at this mandate of Jesus Christ, we are looking at some of those people and circumstances that separate couples today?
THIRD PARTIES.
Human beings that have the potential to separate you and your spouse include those that are close to you; your parents, friends and even children apart from others. The truth is that anyone apart from your spouse is a third party in your home. There are two major mistakes we make about third parties in our home;
We overestimate their usefulness, we also underestimate the potential harm that the third party may cause in our marital relationship.
Perhaps your children would be the most valued among the above, but one thing you must remember is that they won’t be with you forever. If you have the grace of long life, it is with your spouse that you will be together in the evening of life. Consequently, as much as you may love your children, you must not allow a situation in which it would affect your relationship with your spouse. The same applies to the other third parties in your marriage. Though very useful, you must however not allow the third party to create problems that will make them an agent of separation to your home.
BUSINESS ENDEAVOURS / MONEY.
Money and business has put asunder or separated so many couples. Consequently, you must consider it as a potential agent of separation. You need money to run your life. In fact the Bible says;
‘…but money answereth all things'(Eccl.10:19)
Your importance of your business sometimes make it to consume your valuable time. As important as money or your business is, in ensuring quality life and the sustenance of your standard of living, you must always see it as being subject to you. It mustn’t get to a stage in which the pursuit of it would make you to give it higher attention than your home.
DISTANCE.
Physical distance creates circumstances that can put you and your spouse asunder. One of the products of physical distance is loneliness. People are more prone to fall into temptation when they are lonely. Physical distance may also make your spouse to consistently ask for assistance from the opposite sex which may invariably lead to emotional affairs. Any business that will separate you and your spouse for a considerable length of time should as much as possible be avoided by you because physical distance can easily put asunder what God has joined together. You should also avoid being together physically but being emotionally far from one another.
CULTURE.
Cultural beliefs is also a potential separation factor in marriage. There are cultural beliefs that does not encourage unity at home. If you want to run your home in accordance with the will of God, you should learn how to play down on such cultural beliefs. As a rule, when culture clashes with biblical expectations about your marriage, you should focus on the Bible to keep your home.
SOCIAL MEDIA.
A recent but very potent agent of separation is the social media. It is creating and filling noticeable gap in marital relationships. The social media does this by providing all kinds of alternative information and entertainment that might have been provided by your spouse in your discussions. It is provided in such an interesting and variety of ways that when your spouse needs your attention, you might be wondering what is better that he or she could offer. You must consciously make sure that the social media does not reduce the time you spend with your spouse so that it may not erode the value of your spouse in your consciousness.
In conclusion, you must not forget that marriage is God’s idea. His intention about your home is that nothing should separate you and your spouse once you are joined together in marriage. Examine your life, is there any of the above subtle agents that is at work in your marriage?
Receive the grace to reduce their gradual erosion of the value that you place on each other in your home in Jesus name.
Yours In Strengthening Homes.
Dr. Mike Oluniyi.
